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Oneida County Divorce Law Blog

Working through property division takes focus

Asset and debt division matters are often difficult to settle during divorce. The exception to this is when you have a prenuptial agreement in place. In that case, you just follow those provisions and everything is taken care of. We know that not everyone has prenups in place. If you don't, you will have to either work with your ex to get the assets and debts split or you will have to turn to the court to get this done.

We know that you might not be sure how you will split all of your marital property. Your focus might be on the high value assets like real estate, investment accounts and businesses. Dividing these is challenging because you not only have to think about the value, but you also must consider what hanging onto the assets will cost you.

What to do with assets from a qualified domestic relations order

If you are working through a divorce, you may have become so caught up in division of assets that you may have overlooked one key source of value in the marriage: your spouse’s pension plan. The only way to guarantee your share of this reward is through a complicated process that requires a QDRO, or qualified domestic relations order.

As a couple planning for retirement, you deserve a portion of this payout, even if you were not the employee earning it. The decision to pursue this course of action becomes easy when you consider all that you may be able to do with this financial benefit.

Know all options for handling the division of pension in divorce

Pensions are often a top priority when you are divorcing. The person who was working likely put a lot of time in to get the pension to where it is today. When it is time to divide this asset, there are some unique considerations to think about.

One of the most important things to remember is that if you want to ask for part of your ex's pension, you must do this during the divorce. You can't come back later, such as when they retire, and suddenly demand a part of the account.

Logical thinking is your friend during property division

One of the important things that you will have to do if you divorce is to determine who is going to keep which assets, but you can't forget about the marital debts. All of these must be split up in the property division process. It is imperative that you go into this process with a clear head and an idea of what you are going to fight for. We realize that this isn't going to be easy, but we are here to help you evaluate the options that you have.

One mistake that some people make in this situation is that they allow their emotional tie to the assets to dictate their decisions. This isn't ever a good idea because it can leave you laden with assets that are going to cost you money and that won't benefit your future. The only way that you can combat this is to try to think logically.

High-asset divorce doesn't have to be high conflict

High-asset divorces are often fraught with conflict, but this doesn't mean that you have to deal with a high-stress situation. One reason why it is often difficult for people to reduce the stress they experience during a divorce is because they haven't actually accepted the fact that the marriage is over. It can be especially hard to accept the end when the marriage was lengthy or when there are children involved.

Your primary focus when you are going through a split shouldn't merely be on things. Yes, the property division aspect of the process is important. However, you should put more emphasis on protecting your emotions and mental state during the divorce. Think about how much fighting for assets impacts the quality of your life. Ideally, you will make a list of which assets you truly want so that you can strategize to keep those in the settlement.

Stress reduction suggestions for single parents

Trying to make a new life for yourself isn't always easy. In fact, it can be downright hard, especially when you have children counting on you to be there for them. When you transition from being a two-parent home to a single parent household, you have to find new ways to make things work. Consider the below suggestions as you try to reduce your stress so you can be the best parent possible for your children.

First, set the rules for the house. This lets the children know what is expected and also provides them with consequences for when the rules are broken. As tempting as it might be, resist the urge to let things slide at first. When the kids get away with unacceptable behavior, a dangerous precedent is set.

Weaponizing child custody in divorce battles

One of the most heartbreaking subjects of any divorce concerns potential harm to the couple's children. Most divorcing parents are genuinely concerned about doing all they can to minimize trauma to their children.

Sadly, a subset of divorcing parents selfishly use their children to win a custody fight. An angry parent may sense he or she can leverage child custody as a weapon to threaten or get revenge on a spouse. 

Statement balance versus value of pensions

Dividing pensions is one of the more difficult aspects of property division in a divorce. In some cases, this matter involves more than one step. Not only do you have to divide the other marital property in the divorce, you also need to have the valuation done on the pensions. This is one thing that divorcing individuals might miss.

When you are dividing pensions, you can't use the statement worth as the value. These are two very different things, which is one of the reasons this is a challenging situation. We can provide you with the correct information to handle this matter.

Divorce impacts debts and potentially your credit

Most people think of the marital assets when they are considering property division during a divorce. They tend to forget that someone has to pay the marital debts. These have to be split up during the property division process, but it might not be as easy as you think. Oftentimes, these are used to balance out the asset division to make it more equitable.

One thing that you have to realize is that the property division order is a civil order only between you and your ex. Creditors don't have to abide by the order. Unfortunately, this means that if you have a joint account, and your ex is ordered to pay, you might be held responsible for those payments even though your agreement says it is theirs.

2 areas of divorce that might invoke strong emotions

The process of divorce isn't one that is fast. You should plan for this to take time when you are trying to make plans for your future. Typically, it is faster if the parties can negotiate to come up with a settlement, but it is possible to have the court make those decisions if necessary. Having to go through a trial is often less desirable because it takes longer, requires more preparation and costs more.

In some cases, the marital dissolution matters that have to be worked through will invoke strong emotions from both sides. Instead of focusing on your anger, you should take a practical stance for these negotiations. This means looking at the situation from the standpoint of someone who isn't involved in it. You might be able to find suitable solutions to the matters that are truly important. You may also realize that not everything is worth fighting over.

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